Why Do We Get In Our Own Way?
Have you ever felt like you’re running around in circles because of behavioral patterns you default back to? You’re not alone. Most of us can detect certain major themes or beliefs in our lives that keep resurfacing regularly. And sometimes, these beliefs get in the way of growth and success. They’re a bit like moving sand - the more we struggle with them, the deeper we sink.
Why do we get in our own way? Let’s dive into it!
Do you know what you want?
First of all, let’s consider what getting in your own way implies. To put it simply, it implies you already KNOW your way. And not many people can confidently say they chose a certain destination in their life or career journey. Only when you know what the next step is can you really recognise self-sabotage in all its glory.
The big bad Ego
Whenever we look at the reasons behind self-sabotage, most of the time we find the same culprit: our ego. Whether it’s the need for control or the need to feel important and accepted by peers, many times we don’t even realise that our efforts to fulfill our deepest desires are the biggest obstacles in the way of success.
We also get in our own way when we subconsciously fear success (and the responsibility that comes with it). Which ultimately comes down to feeling insecure about the way we would handle success. Could it be impostor syndrome that keeps us from reaching our full potential? It’s a high possibility.
How do we stay in discomfort?
When we start feeling discomfort, we default back into our destructive patterns. Naturally, a solution is to start being comfortable with discomfort. Only then can we truly grow.
Having a greater vision and setting goals and deadlines can help us soldier on in uncomfortable moments. If what we want is more important than how we feel at a certain point along the way, then we can accept pain as part of our journey, instead of running from it.
Another great idea is to keep saying “yes” to things that scare us. Through challenges and gradual exposure, we can convince ourselves that going outside the comfort zone is not as “dangerous” as we might have thought initially. Do the opposite of what your default is (within reason).
Connect with Simple Minds Podcast:
Host: Travis Hayto
Co-Hosts : Conrad Francis,“Magic” Matt J Hanham , Michael Duncan & Jacob Moffit